I think the universe is somehow conspire against me.
Or just it simply want to remind me that, I've wasted one year of my life so that I have to work harder now?
No, that one year I spent was never wasted. I learned a lot. Even though if someone ever asked me, "do you regret your decision to start over from the beginning at where you are now?" Honestly, I would never be able to answer the question.
Sometimes I wish I keep continue my study there. But there are times when I am being gratefull being able to study at the place which many still believe as the best place to study Economy in the country.
But this time at my life...when just this morning, two of my high school friends sent me a link and ask me to fill a questionnaire for their thesis research. When a bunch of my friends struggling with KTTA, when most of them post the exact same picture at my timeline, when they feel the stress at the sixth semester (trust me, I feel "stress" here in every exams)
I just feel a little.....backward? Just look at me now. Achieve-less, had nothing to be proud of, still making my way out of the fourth semester.
Not only wasting a year off, I also graduate with a diploma degree instead of a bachelor degree. It really ruins my timeline plan and used to bother me sooo much. But I've learn to let it go and try to do my plan one step at a time.
Every time I was worried about my future or when I start to seem regreting my decision, my father always remind me that this is just only a matter of time and which thing we prioritize. Most of my friends pursue a bachelor degree to find work while I am here,-if everything runs smoothly-have to work so that I can continue my study. Eventually, me and my friends will reach the same stage of life. Maybe not the same-at least we all have both education and job.
Speaking of which, I am already on the fifth week of the semester. As always, no uts vibe felt yet. No urge to study harder (hiks) maybe because I feel the pressure is not as hard as last semester even though everyone say that this is the highlight of my college years? I don't know.
Anyhoo, I really hope that I could make a redemption this semester. Last semester was a shame and I shall not make the same mistakes.
Wish me luck!-
Sandya
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