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I am not ready

Fuck.
I don't know whether I really want to be with him or this is just a temporary excitement of meeting a familiar faces.

Fuck. Not again.
Not when I started to believe that he is meant for me.
Not when I started to surrender and giving all I have to him.
Not when I started to let go and ready to be together with him.
Please God, no, not again...

I am willing to compromise, I am willing to gave up some things and losing some if that is what it's take to be with you.

But please, don't treat me like I am your punchbag; or worse, your escape zone.
Please don't.

Because I love you already.

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